It’s NOT Funny!

Side note: One of the things I pride myself on is my intelligence.  I got through college, and I even got a master’s degree.  I worked in the Cognitive Science Lab at the University of Memphis, I learnt to train neural networks, run experiments and stats, write and edit articles for publication, and so on.

Ok I am bragging.  But the point is, after being raised to think I was completely stupid, after I got my degree I felt smart.  And I hang on to that as one of my good traits.

So to be defeated by a phone, of all things, pissed me off.  Frustrated me to no end.  Brought me to tears.  And so I did the only thing any sane mother would do…

I called one of my kids.

He was great, of course.  He advised me to be patient while he sorted out what I was trying to do and then told me how to do it.  He told me to not throw my phone out the window.  He also said that his phone didn’t even come with a manual!  Wow.  That impressed me, I must say.  I mean, it impressed me that he used his phone, without having to have read a manual.

All 3 of my kids are involved, in some way, in electronics and computers.   They all know how to use smartphones and whatever else is techy stuff these days.   But they got that gene from their engineer father.  They got the “crying and swearing” gene from me.

So anyway he taught me a few things, and after I did all the things he suggested (in great detail, such as ‘take your finger, place it over the email message icon, and swipe it to the left’ – so I wouldn’t have to see the millions of emails it sneakily downloaded), he proclaimed that my phone probably has a crappy router and I should maybe contact Motorola.

Great.  I can connect my other electronics to my wifi (Nook and laptop), but not my phone.  I don’t know if I will contact Motorola.  I think I will try to connect with some other wifi, next time I am out and about.  Just to see if it works anywhere.

Who’s the dumb one now, Moto??  From smartphone to dumb phone, just by coming through my front door.

Oh yeah, and I forgot to mention that, after he told me it was ok to sign in to Google, it did download all my gmail before I could stop it – if I could have even figured out how to stop that, which I haven’t yet.  It’s fast, I’ll give it that.

So when I looked up my contacts later today, I found it downloaded some of my gmail contacts, but not all of them.  Some were random companies who occasionally send me email, not any of whom I would consider a “contact”.

Especially upsetting was the email address of a friend who passed recently, whom I had forgotten to delete from my gmail contact list.  With his picture and everything.  And 2 email addresses of someone I am blocking.  Not helpful.

The rest?  I don’t know.  I had to add them manually.  Which was ok once Consumer Cellular Pat showed me how.

I had occasion to use my contact list soon after making it.  Someone came over to visit and happened to ask me if I knew the address of a doctor in Altoona.

“As a matter of fact, I do!” I proclaimed proudly, while I powered up Moto.

I found the doctor in the list, and, knowing I had also input his address….

….was unable to actually SEE the address.  Oh it had his name up top, and underneath it the beginning of his address, then dot dot dot (which means, to be continued).  I couldn’t find where it was continued to.

I touched the name, and…of course, it started dialing.  NO!!!

This time I found the red phone icon and hung up.  But I couldn’t figure out how to see his entire entry in my contact list.  And I still don’t know how.

I have had enough for today.  The phone stresses me out and I can only use it in spurts.  In fact, the only reason I am writing this blog entry a day early is because I can’t stand to deal with Moto and its complexity any more today.

Stop laughing, I know it’s not complex to anyone under 40, or really to anyone who has patience with ‘things’ – I don’t – or is naturally in tune with today’s electronics.  It’s horrible to feel so backwards.

For example (as if this smartphone thing wasn’t enough of one), I watch TV on the internet, on my laptop.  I would LOVE to get a Roku stick and watch it on TV.  But I have 3 things holding me back:

1.  I don’t have a TV.  There was a console left here by the last tenants, but it is from the 1980s I think.  So I would have to buy a new TV.  New TVs cost money.

2.  Even worse, there’s that whole “what-TV-is-best” question, which requires internet research, lots and lots of internet research (I only chose Roku because my older son recommended it to me, so I didn’t have to think that one out).  I’m kinda burnt out on searching right now.

3.  Once I get a TV and a Roku, then I have to HOOK IT UP.  Don’t tell me it’s easy.  I know damn well it is NOT going to be easy for me.  Because anything more than, “plug it in and hit the ‘on’ button on the remote” is going to cause major problems for me.

I see me sitting in the middle of my livingroom, crying and swearing.  I see the TV, or the Roku, flashing strange lights and/or malfuntioning and/or searching for channels that somehow will never be found.

Then I see myself picking up my Moto and attempting to call an offspring of mine…touching the wrong contact…and inadvertantly calling my landlady.  Who will probably pick up on the first ring, only to hear so much profanity that she calls the cops to report an obscene phone call.

And all because I just wanted to watch General Hospital.

Hey, that soap opera’s got nothing on the melodrama that is my life.  Watching it almost makes me feel normal.

Sigh.  Today’s weirdness comes from Odd Stuff Magazine online…

“Animal Curiosity: What They See in the Windows is Still a Mystery”

Ok I don’t see this so much as ‘weird’ but just really cute!  Sorry, I just couldn’t find any weird enough news for this week.

Today’s recommendation is for a book, a very old book, that is available for free on the Project Gutenberg website:

“A Discovery Concerning Ghosts” by George Cruikshank, 1864.  Cruikshank was an artist who illustrated, amongst other things, “Oliver Twist” (he was a friend of Dickens’).  He was also a caricaturist.

In this book (which has some of his artwork), he attempts to argue against the existence of ghosts – for example, he asks if apparitions have been seen with dirt on them, does that mean that the dirt is a ghost too? And he points out that the clothing apparitions are seen in is often coincidentally the same clothes they are wearing when alive, in well-known portraits.

At one point in the book he chastises Daniel DeFoe (author of “Robinson Crusoe”) for publishing a book about ghosts that he (DeFoe) knows is not based on true stories!  It’s a really interesting read, if for nothing else to get a feel of life in the 19th century.

Be good.





3 thoughts on “It’s NOT Funny!

  1. charlies5169

    I spent over 30 years in the IT world, and I still have to rely on my kids for information about new technologies. They grew up with technology, and it was always part of their lives, even away from the workplace. We had to learn it, and even then, it was “only a job”. So it comes easier to them. I won’t say “natural”, but it is easier.


  2. Victoria Post author

    Agreed. My youngest learnt how to type well before he learnt to talk. When we were little? Heck, my family didn’t even have color TV! So different these days…



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